Avoid making fake profiles to lure women. They are somebody’s daughter, friend, sister.
Disclaimer: No offense to real men
I am blessed with a sister. I don't know who is interacting with her online or neither should it be my business. But, in last few days, I have learned something from a girl's perspective which is really disturbing and shocking for me ( for the brother in me).
I have a friend who is like a little sister. She asks for advice sometimes and I am presenting some shocking revelations which disturbed me a lot.
Once she removed her display picture (DP) and hence I asked her what happened? I felt that she was influenced by a person who is an IITian and he also doesn't have a DP. HE was showing godly qualities. I checked his profile and found that it was FAKE. Yes, someone was using the name of an IITian who already exists but was not on that social network. I was in a fix. How do I tell her that the guy she is interacting with is not a genuine guy?How will she react? I was feeling awkward but I cared for her and so I had to risk her ire. Thus, I googled to find something to support my case. What I found out was more shocking and heartbreaking.
A 21 year old Hyderabad man had made fake profiles on Facebook (posing as a teenage girl) and had befriended teenage girls of Hyderabad. He used to earn the confidence of the girls and they would reveal their secrets to him. Later, he would blackmail those girls and would ask for money and obscene photos. The teenage girls had a tough time as they have not seen the world. They thought that they are sharing their secrets with another girl online but they were screwed up.
I am trembling with the thought of what those girls have faced and experienced at a tender age. What was their mistake? They made friends online. They are not mature enough to know what to share and what not to share online. Who teaches that? Nobody! So, we cannot blame those girls. They are innocent. They were daughters, friends and sisters of someone. Someone looted them while they were interacting online. It must have been a terrible experience for them.
A brave girl revealed this to her parents and they lodged an FIR and then the Police caught the culprit. I have seen his photo. He is not a criminal by looks. He just looked like any of the decent boys you see around you. After all, our face is not the mirror of what is in our mind.
I am an elder brother. I have never told my sister about this. I feel so awkward to talk about these with my sister. But, this answer is for her and all the girls who trust me. Here on Quora, I have talked with many girls, mostly younger like my little sister. I have got awesome response from them. I thought the reason was that I was genuine. How they knew? God know! They trusted me. I know, I lived to that trust but what if I am a wolf with hidden agendas? No one can know what’s going on my mind.
Today, my friend told me about a guy who greeted her as sister and when she was interacting with him, he started asking personal questions and she got suspicious. When, I explored, I found out that it was his modus operandi to pose as a teenager and approach girls. Then he would start getting comfortable and would befriend them. I found out that he was blocked due to this kind of activity is past and girls have blocked him for being a stalker.
Now, I have made friends here on Quora, consider them as sister and how should I make sure that they can differentiate between those who are genuine or fake. I never knew that girls had to face so much of troubles at times. Sometimes, I am glad that I am not a girl; I bow at them for facing many serious issues without making a fuss.
I hereby suggest some ideas to help my sisters here to differentiate between the real and fake guys.
- Google their name and their job, college, school or whatever details they have provided to find out if they are the real ones. (Still, this is not full proof. Anyone can have an account on my name and put my dp)
- Do not reveal anything personal that may be dangerous must not be revealed to anyone online. In many of my answers, I have encouraged people to make friendship with strangers. But, It was my perspective from a man’s point. I never thought of this fake profile business.
- A girl’s instinct is powerful, use that wisely but it can fail to judge as dirty minds keep on evolving and transforming their ways and means.
- Use the features of Block and Report generously and don’t shy from blocking me if I infringe your private space.
- Never talk about your personal life. Only indulge in intellectual discussions. But, still, this is fallible. Some guys pose as an intellectual and would try to impress the girls. (You have all right to put me in this category right now… I am also a stranger for all of you)
- I thank all the girls who responded to my messages and I always expect to be trusted. But, how can I ask someone to trust me and not XYZ. I am really disturbed that few people are flocking here as if it is a dating site.
People go by looks of DP here on Quora. My friend had done an experiment in her own small way. I refused to accept her logic but secretly, I have started feeling that some people do get influenced by DP, in other words they follow girls with pretty DP.
I am only 3 months old on Quora. I wrote to Ellen Vrana one day and she helped me a lot during my initial days! I asked her how can I pay back and she responded that I can mentor others. So true! I have many friends here and I mentor them and they mentor me. I am not ashamed to be mentored by some 5 years younger to me because age is just another number. There is something to learn from everyone.
Please suggest ideas to make sure that our girls are not duped by someone with a fake profile. I will keep updating the answer.
Always let a few trusted people (friends, cousin and siblings) know about whom you are interacting with online. May be it can help as people who love us, care about us.
Boys are not bad nor girls are bad. We have to learn to weed out the idiots and make this place a better one. Thank you! Apologizing for hurting sentiments of anyone. This is my small contribution in the direction of making girls aware of the cyber crime. But, the world is still beautiful. Stay careful, safe and happy always!
Treat other girls like you want your sisters to be treated. You can't be there for your sisters so please take care of other's sisters and then you have the right to expect that others will respect and care for your sister.
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